focusing on the positive....

just a quick note to say....

woo hoo! I got a "peak" reading on my cbefm (that's clear blue easy fertlity monitor for those of you not wrapped up in ttc) AND last night a positive opk. Yes, to those of you who know about these things, basically I'm wasting my money by doing both the opk and cbefm, but at this point, I'm terrified of missing o.

See, I have PCOS. Which basically means that my ovaries have a lot of little cysts (this is along with other various maladies I've been dx with while ttc..but that's a post for another day). So instead of o'ing regularly on Cycle Day 14 (which is what is considered "normal"...but I know very few women who actually o on Day 14 regularly) I o late in my cycle...before I was dx and put on medication I could go 40 or 50 days with no o.....at that point, it's not likely to happen so you have to go into the doc who will give you medicine to end that cycle by starting your period (forever more referred to here as af...or "the evil witch"). Now that I'm on medication, I do o every month, usually around CD 21........I'm CD 20 today, so according to the opks and cbefm I should o very, very soon........

Dh has been properly notified that his services are required......Don't you love how ttc takes some of the "romance" out of it. Seriously, there have been times when bd'ing has definitely been more of a chore than an enjoyment........

so that's my positive for the day....I'm o'ing, getting accurate readings from the tests, and dh is in town and up for a few days of fun....

I'm trying to think positive, practice "visualization" (come on little sperm, swim towards that egg!) and to have faith that it's in God's hands. I'm hoping his plan for me is to get pregnant NOW. If it's not his plan, I really need to pray for peace and patience....because this is getting harder and harder. Our daughter should be about two weeks old right now if she'd lived. Sometimes my arms ache to hold her.

But I'm taking my cue from the title of this post and focusing on the positive. Most of the time anyways! Hopefully it will lead to a positive hpt in about two weeks. We'll see.
liz